Nick,
Please find attached my recommended improvements for the video. Before reading them, please recognize that I'm trying to help you make this video perfect but recognize that perfection may not be possible given the available resources.
The scripts for this video are excellent. The newscaster is very attractive and reads remarkably well. Your narration is excellent. However, the demonstrations need a lot more work. The demonstrating cyclists must be taught, coached and rehearsed sufficiently so that they at least do not demonstrate dangerous behaviors such as riding on the wrong side of the street, weaving, not looking where they’re going, improperly scanning, signaling and executing stops and turns, and riding out from a driveway without looking.
Overall the video looks very professional and it is totally beautiful to see those kids on bikes and trying to do everything correctly. Thanks for your efforts so far.
Frank
On Sep 3, 2011, at 8:00 AM, director wrote:
Good morning,
I've just finished making script and video edits, they are attached. The script should now conform to the video exactly for all of the scenes that have been completed. The video edits reflect all of the things I could find. If you have additional comments on the video please send them to me in a format similar to the one I've used that gives the sequence time at which the comment applies. I'll collect them and send them to Bobby tomorrow nite.
Both of us have used up all of the hours we committed to on the contract but we still want this to be a finished product that presents well and gets the message across effectively. Bobby thinks he's got about 6 hours of work left to get to that point, and he expects to have that time while on the road this weekend.
For final delivery, Bobby will send a DVD on Tuesday and I'll provide an invoice for payment. Once the video is accepted we'll provide 5 copies in HD resolution with boxes and printed labels.
Chip asked if Bobby will edit a PSA out of this. I assume the answer is "yes" since we've talked about it before, just let us know which scenes you want.
Thanks and have a great weekend.
Nick
--
Nick Hein LCI# 1705
Director, Positive Spin
803 East Brockway Ave
Morgantown, WV
ph 304-276-0213
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