City of
Fax: 304.284.7409
www.morgantown.com
From: "Stephen Graber" <sggraber@hsc.wvu.edu>
To: "Derek Springston" <dspringston@gmail.com>, "Bike Board - Morgantown" <bikeboard@bikemorgantown.com>
Sent: Friday, October 12, 2012 8:02:35 AM
Subject: Re: [Bikeboard] Sustainable Communities grant email/attachment review and approval...
From: bikeboard-bounces@bikemorgantown.com [bikeboard-bounces@bikemorgantown.com] On Behalf Of Derek Springston [dspringston@gmail.com]
Sent: Friday, October 12, 2012 12:14 AM
To: Bike Board - Morgantown
Subject: [Bikeboard] Sustainable Communities grant email/attachment review and approval...
_______________________________________________
Bikeboard mailing list
Bikeboard@bikemorgantown.com
http://wvcompletestreets.org/mailman/listinfo/bikeboard
To: "Derek Springston" <dspringston@gmail.com>, "Bike Board - Morgantown" <bikeboard@bikemorgantown.com>
Sent: Friday, October 12, 2012 8:02:35 AM
Subject: Re: [Bikeboard] Sustainable Communities grant email/attachment review and approval...
Here's my three cents......
I strongly favor the email that shows all the addressees in the "To:" field. I think it's important that the stakeholders can see who's been included.
I remain ambivalent about attaching the letter- personally I hate the extra steps involved in having to click and wait for the attachment to open, however, some may prefer the appearance and weight of a more official document. The attached
letter also creates a two step process- busy people may decide to wait and open it later when they have "more time". There is never more time so this may lead to fewer responses than an immediate all in one process. If I were doing it I'd probably skip the
attachment and make the email the letter addressed to Dear Stakeholder, or Hi All,
Two short suggestions for editing the letter- I like the combination you've created of our two letters- it balances the greater informational content of Emily's and the quicker informailty of mine nicely. So consider these suggestions and
move on!
I think the first sentence in both email and document (assuming you decide to keep both) should not use the pronoun "I". Something like "The Morgantown Bike Board is requesting....." carries more weight in my view.
The Word document is good but has several overly lengthy sentences that have a staccato like feel and too many commas! For example:
"The
technical assistance we plan to apply for with your support is offered through the EPA’s Building Blocks for Sustainable Communities Program, which provides quick, targeted technical assistance to selected local governments and communities using a variety
of tools developed by the EPA and contracted consultants, which have shown positive results."
I'd
suggest breaking them up into two or three individual sentences.
Cheers,
Butch
-------------------------------------------
Stephen G. Graber
Biochem & Mol Pharmacology
PO Box 9142, HSN-3122
West Virginia University
Morgantown, WV 26506-9142
phone: 304-293-2305
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From: bikeboard-bounces@bikemorgantown.com [bikeboard-bounces@bikemorgantown.com] On Behalf Of Derek Springston [dspringston@gmail.com]
Sent: Friday, October 12, 2012 12:14 AM
To: Bike Board - Morgantown
Subject: [Bikeboard] Sustainable Communities grant email/attachment review and approval...
Dear BB Members,
Either late on Friday or early Monday morning, I would like to send the email text below and the letter attachment out to our identified stakeholders. Please review and give your approval as early as possible, but no later than Sunday. Also BIG THANKS to Butch and Emily for their drafts of the letter. They did most of the work!
Here is the list of stakeholders we've identified:
Hugh Kierig - hugh.kierig@mail.wvu.edu - 304-293-9095,
Tom Arnold - tarnold@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7435,
Terrence Moore - tmoore@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7405
Jeff Mikorski - jmikorski@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7405
Chip Wamsley - chipwamsley@gmail.com
Pathfinder - andrew@pathfinderwv.com - 304-296-0076
Perry Keller - Perry.J.Keller@wv.gov - 304-558-9591
Dave Bruffy - bruffy@busride.org - 304-296-3680
Bill Austin - baustin@labyrinth.net - 304-291-9571
University Health Associates- ???
Terry Cutright - MainStreet - director@downtownmorgantown.com - 304-292-0168
BOPARC - Mark Wise - mwise@boparc.org - 304-296-8356
Marjorie Gardens - ???
We also have two options for sending out via email... We can address by name each email and attachment letter to send each out individually OR make generic address and send out all together copying everyone in the TO: field so they can each see who else we're asking. Votes anyone?
Will place the attached letter on the attache BB letterhead when I have access to scanners, printers!
Review this email and comment:
------------------------------------------------------
Dear [insert stakeholder name],
As a member of the Morgantown Municipal Bicycle Board, I am requesting that you please review the attached letter. We are asking you to support our request to the EPA to host a bikeshare program workshop in Morgantown in Spring 2013. If Morgantown is selected as one of the communities to receive this technical assistance, we also need your commitment to attend a one to two day workshop. Please read the attached letter and reply to this email by Tuesday, October 16th with your response.
Sincerely,
Derek Springston
Thanks,
~Derek
Either late on Friday or early Monday morning, I would like to send the email text below and the letter attachment out to our identified stakeholders. Please review and give your approval as early as possible, but no later than Sunday. Also BIG THANKS to Butch and Emily for their drafts of the letter. They did most of the work!
Here is the list of stakeholders we've identified:
Hugh Kierig - hugh.kierig@mail.wvu.edu - 304-293-9095,
Tom Arnold - tarnold@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7435,
Terrence Moore - tmoore@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7405
Jeff Mikorski - jmikorski@cityofmorgantown.org - 304-284-7405
Chip Wamsley - chipwamsley@gmail.com
Pathfinder - andrew@pathfinderwv.com - 304-296-0076
Perry Keller - Perry.J.Keller@wv.gov - 304-558-9591
Dave Bruffy - bruffy@busride.org - 304-296-3680
Bill Austin - baustin@labyrinth.net - 304-291-9571
University Health Associates- ???
Terry Cutright - MainStreet - director@downtownmorgantown.com - 304-292-0168
BOPARC - Mark Wise - mwise@boparc.org - 304-296-8356
Marjorie Gardens - ???
We also have two options for sending out via email... We can address by name each email and attachment letter to send each out individually OR make generic address and send out all together copying everyone in the TO: field so they can each see who else we're asking. Votes anyone?
Will place the attached letter on the attache BB letterhead when I have access to scanners, printers!
Review this email and comment:
------------------------------------------------------
Dear [insert stakeholder name],
As a member of the Morgantown Municipal Bicycle Board, I am requesting that you please review the attached letter. We are asking you to support our request to the EPA to host a bikeshare program workshop in Morgantown in Spring 2013. If Morgantown is selected as one of the communities to receive this technical assistance, we also need your commitment to attend a one to two day workshop. Please read the attached letter and reply to this email by Tuesday, October 16th with your response.
Sincerely,
Derek Springston
Chair, Morgantown Municipal Bicycle Board - EPA Building Blocks Program Committee
-------------------------------------------------------Thanks,
~Derek
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Bikeboard@bikemorgantown.com
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